Pluralist Answers to Ancient Relationship Dilemmas

I am the leader of The Pluralist Party, and in part pluralism is about finding common ground without compromising what one wants. If one thinks that Capitalism is the first way, Socialism is the second way, New Labour and Compassionate Conservatism are the third ways, then the fourth way is Pluralism. The fourth way, unlike the others would not be prescribed, but there would be a different fourth way in different communities, based on the needs and uniqueness of the communities and not an imposed system based on a misplaced ideology.

Finding the fourth way usually means describing the first and second ways in detail and then finding the common ground between them. The question is, how would this apply to common problems in relationships?

When asked, “Which is better, chocolate or sex?”

A first way conservative might avoid talking about sex, a second way liberal might be happy to, a third way socialist might want 50% of people to have chocolate and 50% to have sex. If one had a washing machine in a utility room next to the kitchen, then one might want to notice whether it shakes at a certain stage, so one could be cooking while the food is in the oven!

When asked, “Does my bum look big in this?”

The first way answer is to lie and say “no”, the second way is to tell the truth and say “yes” and suffer the consequences, and the third way is to say “I don’t mind big bums,” and again suffer the consequences. The fourth way would be to say, “Your bum didn’t look big in the other dress so you could have that one for going out and this one for the bedroom!”

When deciding who should pay for the meal on an opposite-sex date?

The first way is for the man to pay, the second way for the women to pay, and the third way to pay half and half. The fourth way would be a ‘ready steady cook’ of each person bringing different ingredients and sharing the cooking and cleaning up! If one owns a pressure-cooker there could be added benefits!

When getting married which surname should be adopted in an opposite-sex union?

The first way is for the woman to take the man’s surname (e.g. Jones) and the second for the man to take the woman’s (e.g. Thomas). The third way is a double-barrel name (e.g. Jones-Thomas). The fourth way could be for the man to adopt the woman’s surname (e.g. Mr Thomas), the woman the man’s (e.g. Mrs Jones). As part of the fourth way, they could also have the double-barrel name when they are acting as a couple, such as on invitations.

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